Guide to Jewish funerals

guide to jewish funerals

This guide provides a practical overview of common Jewish funeral and mourning practices so families know what to expect when making arrangements. Customs can vary by community and denomination (Orthodox, Conservative, Reform, Reconstructionist, Sephardic, Ashkenazi), and rabbinic guidance should always be followed when available.

Core Jewish Values Around Death

Jewish funeral practices are shaped by several key values:

  • Kavod HaMet (Honor of the Deceased): The deceased is treated with dignity at all times.
  • Prompt Burial: Burial typically takes place as soon as possible, often within 24 hours, unless delayed for legal or practical reasons.
  • Simplicity and Equality: Emphasis is placed on modesty rather than display, reflecting the belief that all are equal in death. 
  • Nichum Aveilim (Comforting the Mourners): Supporting the bereaved is a religious obligation.

What Families Should Expect When Arranging a Jewish Funeral 

When a Jewish family contacts the funeral home, arrangements often move quickly and with specific religious considerations. Families can generally expect:

  • Prompt timelines: Burial usually takes place as soon as possible, sometimes within 24 hours.
  • Rabbinic involvement: A rabbi or synagogue may be contacted early to guide religious decisions.
  • Appropriate service options: Services are typically simple and dignified, without elaborate displays.
  • Focus on burial: Traditional Jewish practice calls for ground burial; cremation is generally discouraged.
  • Suitable Casket: The aron is an all-wood construction casket, generally selected as there should be no metal touching your loved one’s body.
  • K’riah (Tearing): Black ribbon provided.
  • Guidance from the funeral director: The funeral director helps coordinate cemetery requirements, Chevra Kadisha involvement, transportation, and timing in accordance with Jewish law and family wishes.

The funeral home’s role is to support the family, explain each step clearly, and ensure all arrangements are handled with dignity and respect.

Timeline: jewish funeral process

Jewish Funeral Timeline - At a Glance

DAY OF DEATH / FIRST CALL

  • Contact the funeral home
  • Please have Hebrew name available
  • Immediate guidance and explanation of next steps
  • Rabbi, synagogue, and cemetery contacted as requested
  • Transportation of the deceased arranged 24 hours a day

BEFORE THE FUNERAL

  • Coordination with the Chevra Kadisha for taharah (ritual preparation)
  • Selection of a simple casket and burial garments (tachrichim)
  • Confirmation of service location, clergy, and timing
  • Preparation of obituary and service details, if desired

FUNERAL SERVICE (LEVAYAH)

  • Brief, dignified service centered on prayer and remembrance
  • Held at the funeral home, synagogue, or graveside

BURIAL (KEVURAH)

  • Ground burial at the cemetery
  • Family and friends may place earth onto the casket

IMMEDIATELY AFTER BURIAL

  • Mourners return home to begin shiva
  • Shiva candle to be lit at this time
  • Community offers comfort, food, and support (note only kosher food should be provided) 

FOLLOWING THE FUNERAL

  • Shiva: First 7 days of mourning
  • Shloshim: First 30 days of mourning
  • Yahrzeit: Annual remembrance on the anniversary of death

Our funeral home remains available at every stage to guide, support, and care for your family. 

step-by-step timeline: what happens next

1. INITIAL call to the funeral home
  • The funeral home gathers essential information and offers immediate guidance. 
  • If desired, the funeral director assists in contacting the rabbi, synagogue, and cemetery. 
  • Transportation of the deceased is arranged with sensitivity to Jewish customs.
2. coordination with chevra kadisha
  • The funeral home coordinates with the Chevra Kadisha for ritual preparation (taharah).
  • Families are reassured that preparation is performed respectfully and in accordance with tradition. (Even in the absence of the Chevra Kadisha)
3. Funeral arrangements
  • The family meets with the funeral director to review burial options, timing, and location.
  • A simple casket (Aron) and burial garments (tachrichim) are selected.
  • Service location (funeral home, synagogue, or graveside) and clergy participation are confirmed. 
4. the funeral service (levayah)
  • The service is typically brief and focused on prayer and remembrance.
  • The funeral director manages logistics so the family can focus on mourning and honoring their loved one.
5. burial (kevurah)
  • Burial takes place at the cemetery.
  • Family and friends may participate by placing earth onto the casket, a meaningful final act of kindness.
6. shiva and mourning support
  • After burial, mourners return home to begin shiva and light the shiva candle.
  • The funeral home can provide guidance on setting up the shiva home and notifying the community. 
7. ongoing care and follow-up
  • Families receive continued support as they move through shloshim, yahrzeit, and other remembrance milestones.
at the time of death
  • When death is imminent or has occurred, a rabbi may be contacted.
  • Traditionally, the body is not left alone before burial; a shomer (guardian) may remain with the deceased, reciting psalms.
  • The eyes and mouth are gently closed, and the body is covered.
preparation of the body (taharah)
  • The ritual washing and preparation of the body is called taharah.
  • It is performed by a sacred burial society known as the Chevra Kadisha.
  • The body is cleansed, purified, and dressed in simple white burial garments (tachrichim).
  • Jewelry is typically removed; personal effects are not buried with the deceased.
the casket
  •  Jewish tradition favors a simple wooden casket (Aron), often without metal or ornamentation.
  • The simplicity reflects humility and allows the body to return naturally to the earth.
  • In some communities, burial in a shroud without a casket is traditional.
The Funeral Service (Levayah)
  • The funeral service, called a levayah, is usually brief, reverent, and focused on honoring the life of the deceased.
  • Services may be held at the funeral home, synagogue, graveside, or cemetery chapel.
  • Families should expect the service to emphasize prayer and reflection rather than ceremony.

Common elements include:

  • Psalms and traditional prayers
  • A hesped (eulogy) highlighting the values, character, and deeds of the deceased
  • The El Malei Rachamim memorial prayer

Music, flowers, and lengthy programs are generally not part of a traditional Jewish funeral unless requested and approved by the family and rabbi.

burial
  • Burial (kevurah) takes place in the ground.
  • Cremation is traditionally prohibited in Jewish law, though practices may vary among non-Orthodox communities.
  • Family and friends may participate by placing earth onto the casket, an act considered a final kindness (chesed shel emet).
mourning PRACTICES and ongoing support

Aninut (Between Death and Burial)

  • Immediate family members are called onenim.
  • Traditional obligations are set aside during this period to focus on burial arrangements.

Shiva (First 7 Days After Burial)

  • Mourning formally begins after burial.
  • Mourners remain at home, refrain from work and entertainment, and receive visitors.
  • Daily prayer services may be held in the home.
  • Mirrors are often covered as a symbol of inward reflection.

Shloshim (First 30 Days)

  • A period of gradual return to normal life.
  • Certain restrictions, such as attending celebrations, continue.

Mourning a Parent

  • Mourning for a parent traditionally lasts twelve months.
  • The Kaddish prayer is recited daily during this time.
memorialization
  •  A headstone (matzevah) is usually placed after a period of time, often following shloshim or up to a year.
  • An unveiling ceremony may be held.
  • Annual remembrance includes:
  • Yahrzeit: The anniversary of death
  • Yizkor: Memorial prayers recited on specific holidays
What to Say and Do When Comforting Mourners 
  • It is customary to say: “May you be comforted among the mourners of Zion and Jerusalem.”
  • Let mourners guide conversation; listening is often more meaningful than speaking.
  • Food is commonly brought to the shiva home as an act of support.
  • Only Kosher food items are appropriate to bring.
Denominational Variations
  • Orthodox: Adheres closely to traditional halachic practices.
  • Conservative: Generally traditional, with some flexibility.
  • Reform/Reconstructionist: May adapt customs to reflect contemporary values
Glossary of Common Terms 
  •  Chevra Kadisha: Jewish burial society
  • Taharah: Ritual washing and preparation of the body
  • Tachrichim: Burial garments
  • Levayah: Funeral service
  • Kaddish: Mourner’s prayer
  • Shiva: Seven-day mourning period
  • Yahrzeit: Anniversary of death
  • Aron: Jewish all-wood casket

This guide is intended as an educational overview and should be used alongside rabbinic guidance and family preferences